Today, I want to have some fun at the expense of Vegas tourist retail. For the literal readers- this post is dripping with sarcasm.
As you might recall from yesterday’s post, I noted the …unique… retail situation at the Paris Hotel and Casino Las Vegas, or as I have been dubbing it: Vegas-Paris. As someone who appreciates a fruitful Macy’s trip, I am left underwhelmed and mildly confused with the shopping at Vegas-Paris.
As a refresher, here is the gist of what you can treat yourself with for a small fortune:
I’m not implying that these are necessarily bad things to have in such a quirky hotel, and I am not slighting those who enjoy such trinkets. After all, you may recall my mug conundrum. I still regret, by the way. Also, if you’ve ever seen my home, you can vouch that I cherish some good Eiffel Tower swag. Here, I simply wished for a few more options that didn’t involve so much resin and glitter.
However, I was thrilled to discover the enormous wardrobe opportunities that the hotel shops offer. Vegas-Paris has apparel suited for every personality:
“Premium Brand Team France” Athletic Shirt: For that special sporty someone who doesn’t conform to the limitations of a country’s actual national colors. Blue, white, and red… huh? No. It’s all about the Pink, gray, and aquamarine now.
“99” T-Shirt: For those who have 99 problems, but fashion ain’t one.
“I see London, I see France” T-Shirt: The perfect shirt to complement a case of Peter Pan Syndrome.
“Pardon My #@*&! French” T-Shirt: For the Red Bull addict.
“Would You Help Me with My French?” T-Shirt: For the professional student.
“French This” T-Shirt: For the beer-can-crushing enthusiast.
“Le Dude” T-Shirt: For the fluent Franglish speaker.
Skull and Crossbones with Beret T-Shirt: For me, because I actually want this in my life.
“Moi, Moi, Moi” (Me, Me, Me) Sweater: For the gals who enjoy staring at glass ceilings.
And… my favorite…
“I’m Not French But We Can Try It” T-Shirt: Because when you buy two, you get a can of pepper spray for free.*
There you have it. Who really needs Givenchy or Dior, anyways?
With that, I am done teasing for the day!
À la prochaine!
*No, that won’t really happen.